that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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