try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
