idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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