Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
