You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn off my feet"
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize