Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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