Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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