I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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