Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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