you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
