Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
