haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
