Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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