i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
