It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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