Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Banned from zoo.
Again?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Randomize
