when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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