Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
