I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
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he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
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my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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