i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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