It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
My feet surprised me
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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