I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize