i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
