that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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