just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
