I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
