i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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