It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
well I can't set my house on fire every night
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
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