you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
