Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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