I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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