She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
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