you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
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