if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i walk over a car last night?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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