Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures

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  (586) You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures http://tfl.nu/u67a
  Replies (2) Good night (844) Bad night (1231)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything

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  (954): just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything http://tfl.nu/6c7y
  Replies (20) Good night (4066) Bad night (2072)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.

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  (302): I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long. http://tfl.nu/8u3p
  Replies (59) Good night (3497) Bad night (1392)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away

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  (732): i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away http://tfl.nu/d57a
  Replies (40) Good night (4861) Bad night (3255)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.

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  (609): You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics. http://tfl.nu/ug0s
  Replies (6) Good night (1221) Bad night (3581)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"

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  (928): I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?" http://tfl.nu/rf85
  Replies (32) Good night (8188) Bad night (1856)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.

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  (601): After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable. http://tfl.nu/u7w9
  Replies (5) Good night (2855) Bad night (1245)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.

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  (484): the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka. http://tfl.nu/bmjy
  Replies (11) Good night (3067) Bad night (830)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?

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  (404): Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture? http://tfl.nu/tx1u
  Replies (3) Good night (553) Bad night (1023)
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  (310): View more from California

  Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).

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  (310): Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok). http://tfl.nu/yawu
  Replies (2) Good night (973) Bad night (429)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  My booty call just moved 2 min from my house

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  This has pregnancy written all over it

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  (513): My booty call just moved 2 min from my house (1-513): This has pregnancy written all over it http://tfl.nu/2h6m
  Replies (1) Good night (1678) Bad night (604)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women

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  (808): there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women http://tfl.nu/4eji
  Replies (2) Good night (675) Bad night (366)
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  (527): View more from

  I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.

  (1-527): View more from

  Top night. Top night.

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  (527): I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered. (1-527): Top night. Top night. http://tfl.nu/68t6
  Replies (1) Good night (542) Bad night (683)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed

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  (306): I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed http://tfl.nu/ufxs
  Replies (1) Good night (572) Bad night (337)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted

  (815): View more from Illinois

  HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA

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  (815): Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted (815): HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA http://tfl.nu/meeq
  Replies (2) Good night (727) Bad night (410)

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