thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
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