he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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