i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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