The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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