I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
