she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Just pee around me
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Randomize
