If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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