Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
