i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
