yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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