Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
