your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
