I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
