shes about as inviting as chlamydia
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
