it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
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just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
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Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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