Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
