Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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