i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
